Love Found

Over the past year I’ve been too stubborn, afraid of getting hurt, and unwilling to take chances. Funny how life throws a curve ball your way and it changes everything.

The idea of opening my heart to another was terrifying but after a year I was finally ready to the take on the challenge, realising the unlimited possibilites that would come from sharing my life with someone … someone who loved me back.

No Words. No Fuss.

Would you mind if I sat a while with you?
No words. No fuss.
I just want to sit in your warmth, feel your breath, and share in your light.
The crazy day keeps knocking on my door, begging me to come out from under these sheets.
But you’re too good to pass up and the day can wait.
I’m happy with you, happy enough to forget all about the clouds that were settling in just before you lit up my life, bright and sunny for the world to see.

I Am Happy

I was tired of everything. It felt like I was falling apart. I thought I had given up on love. Along with a number of events, I dug myself a hole where I seemed to lose myself in confusion.

But somehow, one night, I was found by this beautiful person, with a heart of an angel. The first night we talked uninterruptedly for hours, and we continued to talk the next day and the next and the next… we continued to talk. We spoke with words and looks and smiles.
 
He took my hand as he walked with me; I smiled all night long. Before I knew it, time passed and I am where I am today.

There’s so much more of this story but its just details. What matters is that these weeks, these months, have given me hope, a light to count on. I know for sure that my heart lies in his hands; I’m not afraid. His eyes tell me that nothing can go wrong. His heart tells me I am happiness. His words are nothing but the truth.

I know now, for sure, that there are saviours in this world. They may be rare, but they are there.

He is amazing. I am happy. 

The Journey

No relationship is ever a failure if you manage to learn something about yourself. Just because it didn’t work out doesn’t mean it wasn’t a necessary part of your journey to becoming who you’re meant to be.

Heartache

Most of us have been in a relationship that has turned sour and my guess is we’ve all felt the hurt that comes with that.

We feel miserable, depressed, and lonely. How do you move on from the heartache? It’s not easy, but it is do-able.

A good friend told me:

“It is not the end of the world. You are still going to wake up tomorrow and eat your bagel just like the day before and the day before that. Life is not over. You are still you and no one can take that away from you.”

She was right. 

Something

I want something to happen. Something that will make me believe again. Something that will make me want to put my heart out there again. Something that will make me want to learn to say “I love you” again.

What I Fear

I’ve spent my life feeling like someone who was on the move. An itch would get under my skin and inflame the hairs up and down my arms, tingling through the back of my neck. Little imperfections in my environment would become huge gaping holes propelling me to go, to move, to change for the sake of change. I always – always – saw an ending for me that was somewhere alone. It’s cheesy but true – my ending in my mind was always me, living alone, with a couple of cats. I wasn’t afraid of commitment … I was afraid of abandonment. Love to me was always something you left before it left you. End of story.

But my story has changed now. Life has changed that for me. Love has changed that for me.

Life is an open question now, one that I stare at a great deal – surprised that I get to have a life I never thought I would, never thought I could. Every single day is a surprise because nothing is the way I once suspected it would be.

Right now it’s about determining how to let go of how I always saw the end and allowing life to take me where I’m meant to be. With who I’m meant to be with.